


5 Times Rafael didn't trust his family and the 1 time he did.

by Fanatic_weirdo



Series: Lightwood-Bane Family [5]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare
Genre: 5:1, Family Feels, M/M, Trust Issues, past fear, past trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-17
Updated: 2017-12-17
Packaged: 2019-02-16 06:58:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13048881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fanatic_weirdo/pseuds/Fanatic_weirdo
Summary: 5 stories of when Rafael's past didn't let him trust his family, and 1 story where he did.





	5 Times Rafael didn't trust his family and the 1 time he did.

**Author's Note:**

> So Raphael Santiago is alive in this series (I explain why they have the same name) so yeah, it's tv verse more than book verse other than their names. Also Rafe went through some bad stuff in Buenos Aires so be aware, it's nothing graphic but there is some talk about vampires being terrible to him. I don't anyone you recognize! Thank you Christin for all the help!

1.

“Here you go.” 

Magnus put a plate of food in front of Rafael, who stared at it. He assumed it was chicken but there was a kind of yellow stuff on it and it sat on a bed of rice. 

“Wh-what is this?” he asked anxiously. He’d been with Alec and Magnus for 3 months now, and so far they had made sure he hadn’t gone hungry or cold or in need of anything, really; he still had nightly nightmares, though, and he wasn’t quite fully comfortable living with a family. He couldn’t bring himself to trust them, not that it was their fault. Adults hadn’t meant good things for him for the past 4 years, so living with two, even if they did rescue him and had been kind to him, wasn’t easy for the 5 year old. 

“It’s chicken curry,” Alec said with a soft smile. Rafael liked Alec. After all, he was the one to take him off the streets and bring him here where he didn’t have to beg and hide and wasn’t as scared all the time. 

“Oh. I would watch people in restaurants eat and they talked about how good the ‘curry’ was,” Rafael said quietly. He missed the heartbroken expression Alec and Magnus exchanged. “It wasn’t yellow though,” he whispered to himself.

“If you don’t want it, kiddo, you don’t have to eat it,” Magnus claimed. 

Rafael’s stomach dropped. They said he’d never go hungry again, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t have to eat what was in front of him in order to keep it that way. He didn’t want to go hungry. He’d spent 4 years hungry.

“NO!” he cried. “I’ll eat it!” he insisted. Magnus opened his mouth to clarify, but Max giggled instead.

“Curry is yummy,” the three year old claimed. He’d immediately liked the older boy. Rafael hadn’t been so sure about the blue boy at first. To be fair, growing up alone on the streets of Argentina with the Sight meant he saw all sorts of people, including Warlocks with differing marks. He had been unsure of them, though most of them ignored him. Vampires, he truly didn’t like; they had fed off him since he’d been unable to out run them at times. Shadowhunters, it depended. He knew the ones with a circle on their necks were the ones who had destroyed his life, killed his parents, and left him homeless and alone. The ones without the circle, like Alec, they seemed all right. He’d only met a few, since Alec didn’t want to overwhelm him by taking him to the institute too often, especially after the incident with the vampire, but he’d liked Izzy, and the red haired girl. Jace…he wasn’t so sure about.

Rafael slowly stabbed his fork into the chicken and looked up at Alec who had a kind expression on his face that Rafael had discovered was meant solely for his family and, apparently, Rafael now. Max was eating with his toddler fork, getting more food on his face and high chair than his mouth. Rafael slowly brought the food to his mouth. It was delicious. His eyes widened in surprise and delight. 

“Good?” Magnus asked, receiving a nod from Rafael. “I’m glad you tried it and liked it, but in the future if you don’t want to eat something, you don’t have to. We’d like for you to try it first, but if you don’t like it, we’ll make you something else. You’re never going to go without food.” 

 

Rafael looked at him before nodding slowly. He couldn’t quite bring himself to fully trust the Warlock at his word. He’d always had to eat when and what he could, whether he liked it or not, because gross food was better than no food.

He was lucky this time, that the food was good and he enjoyed it. But he knew he’d never speak out otherwise in the future. This kindness could all just be an act. He had to look out for himself, protect himself, survive by himself.

 

2\. 

Alec found Rafael looking at the small pile of clothes on the bed as if he’d never seen anything like it. He probably never had, but if Alec thought about it too hard, his heart would break even further for the little boy. 

“Hi,” he said softly so he wouldn’t scare the little boy. 

Rafael snapped his face up to him but didn’t make eye contact, something that didn’t surprise Alec. I had only been five days since Alec and Magnus had brought him to their home. He had yet to actually speak to them in any language. At first, when he didn’t talk, Magnus tried Spanish, but there was still no reaction, so they assumed the child knew both English and Spanish since he would nod or shake his head to questions in both languages. Still, he hadn’t actually spoken aloud, and whether that was because he had never learned or whether he was just still too terrified, Alec and Magnus didn’t know. 

“Magnus got those for you. I hope you like them,” Alec reported. Rafael looked at the pile again before looking back at Alec. He opened his mouth, but only a small sound came out before he pointed to his chest questioningly, his face scrunched in confusion before shaking his head. 

Rafael’s thoughts raced. Alec had to be lying. They couldn’t be for him. Nothing he got was ever his. If he got food, he stole it; if he got clothes, he stole them. Nothing was his to begin with. The Shadowhunter adult was nice to him and so was the Warlock, but Rafael couldn’t help but be suspicious of both of them. What did they want with a dirty orphan? 

“Everything in this room is yours. The clothes, the bed. We’ll get you some toys soon, though honestly I don’t know if you would know what to do with them,” he said the last part to himself more than to Rafael. “He got you new shoes too,” Alec motioned to the closet. The door was open so Rafael could see inside so he’d know there is nothing bad hiding inside, but he couldn’t quite bring himself to turn his back to Alec. 

Alec knew this and went into the closet to grab the smaller pair of sneakers Magnus had magicked for Rafael. He’d had to guess at the size, hoping he was a correct size for a 5 year old, but they both knew the malnourished boy was small for his size, so he’d conjured both a 9, which was usually for a 4 year old, and a 10 for a 5 year old. They were light up sneakers, though Rafael wouldn’t realize that until Alec pointed it out. 

“Look, they light up,” Alec said, his voice calm and even. It was soothing, even to the nervous kid. He tapped the shoes gently so their lights would go off wildly, and Rafael’s face brightened in surprise and awe. Alec smiled and held them out to him. He stared at the shoes and once again pointed to himself, confused. 

“Yes, they’re for you,” Alec said gently. He was glad Rafael didn’t know him well enough to hear the sadness in his voice. “Would you like to try them on to see if they fit?” 

They had yet to be able to get Rafael to take his old, ratty shoes off for anything more than a bath, and they’d only managed one of those because he’d nearly had a panic attack he was so frightened. Magnus had offered to use his magic, but Alec didn’t think that was a good idea considering how skittish he still was of the Warlock. He didn’t stink and wasn’t dirty after the first one so they thought it would be best to just let Rafael come to understand baths weren’t bad on his own terms and not traumatize him further if it wasn’t necessary. 

“I’ll help,” Alec offered, kneeling in front of Rafael, even though he made no motion to go towards his feet. Rafael shook his head, reaching out for the sneakers before jerking his hand back, his eyes widening as if expecting Alec to berate him for wanting something that wasn’t his to want. Instead Alec put the shoes down, pushing them towards Rafael. Rafael blinked several times before sitting down on the floor and slowly taking his own old shoes off. He’d stolen them from a mundane street vendor over a year ago. They were too small now, hurt his feet, and there were holes in them, but they were his. Alec stood and stepped away, not wanting to interfere with the strides Rafael was making. Rafael picked up the new sneakers, which had a fresh pair of socks in them. He took the socks out, holding them delicately. He’d never seen such clean, pretty socks; even the ones he’d seen on tourist in Buenos Aires had been dusty from their walking all day. Looking at them he knew his dirty feet were not worthy of such nice things. Alec watched him for a moment more before kneeling down again, this time closer to Rafael. 

“You deserve nice things, buddy,” Alec said softly. Tears filled Rafael’s eyes and he shook his head. “Yes, you do. You’ve done what you had to do to have clothes and food. Magnus and I don’t blame you; we don’t judge you. Magnus was homeless when he was a kid, too, and he had to do some things he wasn’t proud of, but you do what you have to do to survive. You are a survivor, Rafael. We are offering you these things with no conditions; they are yours.” 

Rafael had tears streaming down his face as Alec gently took the socks out of Rafael’s hands. Though he saw the expression of distress on the child, he knew Rafael would never put them on himself. So he did it for him, gently taking his foot, which still had cuts and dirty bottoms, and put a clean white sock on it. Then he did the other foot. Rafael sniffled as Alec picked up the sneakers and put them on his feet too. Alec tapped them when they were on the small feet and they lit up. Was that a smile Alec saw?

Alec stood and let him stare at the shoes on his feet. He began to pick up the clothes on the bed in order to move them to the dresser when a hand shot out and grabbed his leg desperately. The sound that came out of Rafael’s mouth almost made the stoic Shadowhunter crumple. 

“I-I’m just putting them away. They’re yours; they’re just going to go right here.” 

“No.” 

It was the first word Alec had heard come out of the child’s mouth, and it was one of heartbreaking desperate plea. 

“Por favor,” he whimpered. 

“You want me to leave them on your bed?” Alec asked, trying to hold back tears. Rafael nodded, tugging weakly at his pants to keep him from continuing to the dresser. Alec immediately put the clothes back and Rafael burst into sobs. Alec couldn’t help himself. He scooped the slight child into his arms and held him tightly. The kid didn’t trust that this was real, didn’t believe he was safe, that he could have things of his own, that he could have a family of his own, but he would. If it took every day of the rest of Alec’s life, he would make sure Rafael knew he, Magnus, and Max were his.

 

3\. 

Rafael sat quietly in Alec’s office, watching him closely. He’d been with Alec and Magnus for about a month and half now. Alec normally didn’t bring him to work; he stayed with Magnus during the day. He’d grown to like Magnus quite a lot. He was patient with Rafael, with his inability to look into their eyes, with his hesitancy to speak unless spoken to. He had started teaching Rafael to read and though Rafael wasn’t good at it, Magnus never got frustrated with him. 

Today Magnus had an early meeting with a client that he couldn’t bring the boys to so they had come to work with Alec until Magnus was done. Rafael liked being with Alec. Alec was kind but serious, much like Rafael was. There was a steady calm to Alec that brought Rafael comfort; the man didn’t seem to get angry easily, and he didn’t raise his voice. Watching him behind the desk, Rafael believed the man belonged there, like he’d been born to run this Institute.

Alec looked up at Rafael and smiled. 

“I’m impressed,” he told him. Rafael looked at him confused. “You haven’t spoken a single word since we got here. I had to send Max to Izzy so I could get some work done.” 

Rafael blushed but smiled slightly at the thought of the blue toddler who was so loud and had so much energy that it often exhausted Rafael. He had no idea how Alec and Magnus did it. Rafael shrugged casually, biting his lower lip anxiously.

“I’m used to having to be quiet. When you’re not visible to most people around you, you have to be quiet if you want to remain unnoticed.” 

Alec flinched at the boy’s words. Alec had been a quiet child, too, but that was just his personality. It didn’t have anything to do with the fact that he had to be quiet to survive.

“Lightwood, I have a bone to pick with you,” the voice caused Alec to roll his eyes as he looked up at the door to see the vampire entering rudely, though he smiled when he saw his husband was with the vampire.

“It’s Lightwood-Bane, Santiago,” Alec turned his chair to face the door, away from 5-year-old Rafael. Suddenly, Raphael and Magnus froze, Raphael’s focus honing in on the child that had been sitting on the couch and was now on the floor, pressed as close to the wall as he possibly could be. He was almost as pale as the vampire, and he was shaking more violently than Alec had ever witnessed, even when he’d first moved in.

“Rafe?” Alec asked carefully. It was Alec’s voice that caused Rafael to finally make a sound. He whined sadly. He’d been tricked. He thought the Lightwood-Banes actually gave a damn about him, but here they were, handing him over to a vampire. He hated vampires, they hurt him time and time again. He was unable to out run them and an orphaned Shadowhunter was an easy snack. He supposed he was lucky they never killed him, but there were plenty of times he’d begged them to kill him so they would stop. But they would laugh cruelly and ask why they would give up such a delicious meal by killing him. 

“Rafe, he’s not going to hurt you,” Alec promised. It was then that Rafael realized the vampire was no longer in the room. Magnus was standing back with his hand over his mouth in horror. He hadn’t even thought about the little boy being scared of vampires. Of course he was scared of vampires; he’d been scared of everyone, why not a group of people that probably took advantage of Rafael’s lack of protection against them. 

“He’s a friend,” Magnus cried, but Rafael whimpered again and hugged himself tighter. How could he be so stupid, letting them fool him into thinking they wouldn’t hurt him, that they would protect him?

“Rafael,” Alec whispered and it was then that Rafael realized how close Alec had managed to get to him. “Do you think we’re going to let him—” Alec swallowed the emotion in his throat before being able to continue. “Do you think we were going to let him feed off you?” 

Magnus gasped in alarm at his husband’s question, but also that he knew that’s exactly what Rafael thought.

Rafael let out a few dry sobs and nodded hesitantly. Alec cursed quietly and took a step back. 

“He should go, and you should take Max home. I’m gonna keep Rafael here,” Alec said under his breath to Magnus. 

“I don’t think that’s what he needs,” Magnus replied, his voice shaking as Rafael sat, his feet curled into his chest, his eyes screwed shut and his hands wrapped defensively around his neck. 

“I don’t think he’s okay to go home right now,” Alec replied. The ‘especially with a Downworlder’ remained unsaid. Magnus flinched and nodded, knowing his husband was right. Alec leaned in and kissed Magnus softly. 

“I want to talk to him first,” Magnus told him and Alec moved so Magnus would have an easier path. “Rafa,” Magnus says soothingly. Rafael’s breathing accelerated and he didn’t move or even open his eyes. “Not all Downworlders are bad,” he claimed. 

Rafael nodded. “Not Max,” he whimpered. And the fathers couldn’t help but smile sadly that the 5 year old had so easily taken to the 3 year old. 

“Yeah, definitely not Max, and not me, and not our friend either. I’m sure vampires hurt you, but here in New York, they don’t attack little kids. Especially not him. He is nice, he is on our side, he’s a good guy, Rafael, I promise you.” Rafael had opened his eyes but his hands hadn’t been removed from his neck and he was still curled tightly into himself. “You know how you picked Rafael as your name because you liked it?” Magnus asked. They’d asked Rafael if he had a name and at first he’d shaken his head before explaining no adult had ever called him anything, but he’d heard a mom calling for her son Rafael when he was 4 and he’d always said he wanted someone calling him with such love that he decided that was his name. 

Rafael nodded at Magnus’s question.

“His name is Raphael, too.” Rafael looked at Magnus whose face was full of gentility and concern. “A long time ago, way before you were born, Alec thought that Raphael had hurt Isabelle. Alec beat him up, and you know Isabelle can take care of herself. Alec would never, ever let him hurt you.” 

Had this not been so serious Alec might have said something about his ‘thought’ about Raphael and Izzy, but he didn’t need to make Rafael think the vampire would actually hurt him. Despite their past, Raphael and Alec had come to an agreement because the vampire loved Magnus and adored Max, and though they never spoke it, they had grown fond of each other as well. Rafael glanced up at Alec who nodded firmly. 

It took Alec nearly an hour to coax Rafael out of his fetal position. Magnus had left, sad that he hadn’t been able to convince Rafael to trust them. Both he and Alec understood, but it certainly didn’t make either of them feel better that the child thought they would hand him over to a vampire for feeding. The thought made Alec sick to his stomach. He knew trust was earned and apparently they hadn’t earned Rafael’s. He just hoped they hadn’t lost what little they had gained.

4.

Magnus didn’t particularly like that the young Warlock came to his home unannounced, but he certainly wasn’t dangerous. Still, he was going to send Rafael and Max to Rafael’s room, not wanting to put them at risk even if there was no risk to be found. When Rafael had seen the unfamiliar Warlock he’d tensed up. He’d gotten much better in the 6 months he’d been there. He’d even grown to love Magnus, and while trust was something he struggled with he had come to know that Alec and Magnus would never purposefully harm him. Other people were a very different story. He’d met Madzie and Catrina and liked them, as well as Izzy and Maryse. Jace still wasn’t someone he was comfortable around, but he was trying. 

The young Warlock was wild and adventurous, barely 40 years old even though he looked and acted 17. Rafael watched him closely when he first entered. For his Warlock mark he had wings and bright violet eyes that seemed mischievous and so alive it fascinated Rafael and Max. The blue toddler waddled up to him before Magnus could stop him, giggling and reaching up to be picked up. Magnus laughed breathlessly at Max’s brazenness. 

“This is Max, who is clearly not shy,” Magnus introduced the Warlocks. The visitor picked up the demanding child, propping him on his hip. 

“Hello Max. I’m Vanya,” Vanya held out his finger to Max who gripped it tightly as Vanya chuckled, shaking it. “What’s your brother’s name?” 

Rafael gasped quietly and gripped the column he was hiding behind tighter.

“Rafa!” Max cried happily, giggling as Vanya used his wings to tickle him. Magnus smiled softly at the young Warlock’s kindness towards his sons. 

“Rafe, he’s not going to hurt you,” Magnus called promisingly. Rafael poked his head around the column. “This is Vanya, a client of mine.” Rafael nodded but didn’t move closer. “Would you take Max into your room while we talk for a minute, please?” 

Max pouted for a moment, but when Rafael called out for him he squirmed out of Vanya’s arms and ran to Rafael. As they walked into the bedroom Rafael heard Vanya say, “Those two are going to be trouble for you when they’re older.” Rafael’s heart dropped.

“Oh they are already thick as thieves. Lilith forbid we try to make Max do anything without Rafael,” Magnus chuckled. Rafael sighed in relief. He didn’t sound angry. He sounded affectionate. 

Rafael lead Max into the bedroom and closed the door. He and Max played whatever Max wanted to play for about 15 minutes, then there was a quiet knock on the door before it opened. 

“Hey boys, I have to run out for a little while, but Vanya is going to stay and watch you,” Magnus said as he came into the room. 

“W-where are you going,” Rafael stuttered. “W-why is he watching us? Wh-why can’t Alec?” 

Magnus put his hand on his back comfortingly, smiling softly. “Because Alec is on patrol and I’m only going to be gone 30 minutes at the most,” Magnus claimed, brushing Rafael’s hair out of his face. “I told Alec so he knows Vanya’s here, and I’m a portal away,” he stated. 

“30 minutes?” Rafael asked anxiously. Magnus conjured a watch and showed it to Rafael. 

“See where the long one is now?” Magnus asked, Rafael nodded, “When it’s here,” he pointed to the 4, “I’ll be home, okay?” Rafael squinted for a moment before nodding in agreement. “I promise, kiddo, I’m coming home,” Magnus promised. 

Both boys liked Vanya, he was funny and did silly magic tricks to make them laugh. But then Rafael looked at the watch. The long hand was on the 5; Magnus said it would be on the 4. 

Vanya saw the panic. “Rafael,” the man’s voice was soft, losing its playfulness. “He’s going to be okay, he’s just a little late.” 

“But he promised,” Rafael whined. Vanya’s heart ached as the 6 year old fidgeted and chewed on the inside of his cheek nervously. 

“And I know he intended to keep that promise. I’m sure he just needs a little extra time to deal with the problem, but he’ll be back really soon,” Vanya promised. 

Rafael crisscrossed his knees and held the watch in front of him watching the seconds tick by. Max didn’t seem worried but rather was entranced by Vanya and enjoyed talking rapidly with the other warlock. Rafael, however, had had too many promises broken to not worry about Magnus. True, Magnus had never broken any of his problems, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t. And he might not even mean to break his promise; his parents didn’t plan on dying, but they did, leaving him all alone. And what if Magnus did the same? What if he died? Being immortal didn’t mean never dying. Rafael didn’t know what he went to deal with, but what if it was more than he could handle? Rafael refused to cry as the long hand reached 7, even if he wanted to, even if his heart was breaking at the thought that Magnus would never walk back through a portal. He knew he’d have Alec, and sure he’d bonded with Alec first, but 6 months later they were both the most important people in his life. 

A portal beginning in the living room caused Rafael to hold his breath. Magnus? Max didn’t even look up from the toy in his hand while Rafael wouldn’t take his eyes off the swirl of magic in front of him. 

“Vanya, you are officially on my list,” Magnus said as he walked back through the portal covered in black liquid. “This jacket cost more than your apartment,” he growled at the younger Warlock who grinned playfully as Magnus rolled his eyes. Then Magnus realized Rafael was staring at him “Hey buddy.”

“You said the hand would be on 4,” Rafael whispered. Magnus’s face fell in sadness.

“I know.” He didn’t excuse himself; even though the demon Vanya had stupidly summoned had caused him more trouble than he had expected, he didn’t think the little boy needed to hear his excuses right now. He kneeled down in front of Rafael who just looked so sad. “I’m so sorry I made you worry,” he said softly. Rafael nodded and threw his arms around Magnus’s neck, getting the black stuff that was on Magnus on his clothes. 

Magnus had come home that time. Maybe he would the next 100 times, but what about that one time that he didn’t? Rafael shook his head, now was not the time to think about that, for how he would just cling to him and the promise he’d kept.

5.

Rafael sighed heavily as he sat in the chair across Alec’s desk. Alec chuckled, amused. Rafael had been with them for almost a year. He knew that while he still called them Alec and Magnus, the two men considered him as much their son as Max was and they had loved him since the first night. Rafael, however, had taken a little longer to adjust and become attached to them, but he now fully viewed them as his parents, even without the ‘Dad’ and ‘Papa’. 

“Bored?” Alec asked, not looking up from his paperwork. Rafael blushed even as Alec smirked, “I’m sure Izzy would be happy to hang out.”

“Hang out? You mean lecture me and be even more boring than you?” Rafael responded.

“Hey!” Alec laughed throwing a balled up piece of paper at his son. Rafael giggled when it hit him in the chest. “What about starting to train?” he suggested. Rafael lit up and nodded rapidly. Alec smiled and nodded sending a quick text on his phone, “I’ll get Jace to teach you.” The smile faded from Rafael’s face and he bit his lower lips anxiously. “Is-is that not okay?” Alec asked, his tone open and gentle, not judgmental or angry.

“No, it’s okay. I just thought you would do It.” That wasn’t the full truth. Yes, Rafael would love to be taught by Alec and he had thought Alec meant that, but, mostly, the hesitancy that existed now was because of Jace. Rafael hadn’t fully been able to let himself trust the man. There was something that Rafael couldn’t get past with him. 

“Want to wait until I’m finished then? I’ll be done in a couple of hours,” Alec suggested. Rafael was torn; he wanted Alec to teach him, but waiting another two hours… But if he didn’t then he’d be training with Jace. 

“I’ll train with Jace first, then you can teach me,” Rafael said softly. Alec smiled but then his smile fell again.

“Rafael, do you not like Jace?” Rafael looked up worried but Alec shook his head, “You can say you don’t. I just don’t want to force you to spend time with someone you don’t like.” Rafael blinked slowly, tugging on his bottom lip like he did when he was nervous. 

“It’s not that…” Rafael admitted. He was getting better about talking about things but he certainly wasn’t ready to possibly insult his uncle. Alec was waiting patiently; he was always so patient. “I don’t know. It’s just…” Rafael shrugged, trailing off, then finally ending with, “something.” 

Alec smirked slightly. “I get that,” he admitted. “Jace can be loud and abrasive sometimes,” Rafael nodded a bit in agreement. 

“And he takes you away,” Rafael murmured. 

Alec straightened his head back in confusion, “What do you mean he takes me away?” 

“You’ll be at home and then Jace will call and you leave,” Rafael said, picking at his nails. Alec smiled affectionately having to stop himself from hugging his son as tightly as he could. Instead he stayed behind his desk, putting his chin in his hand. 

“He’s not what takes me away, Hijo. He’s my second in command, so if there is an attack on the city when I’m home and they can’t handle it with a small troop, then he has to call me. Your old man is the best Shadowhunter at the Institute, you know,” he whispered loudly trying to make Rafael laugh. And it worked, at least until Jace burst in.

“Best Shadowhunter at the Institute? Aww, you’re talking about me,” he said cockily. Rafael pressed his lips together as Alec rolled his eyes.

“Yes, we were talking about you, but, trust me, it was not about how great you are,” Alec claimed, winking sweetly at Rafael who smiled slightly. 

“Oh, then you must be talking about Rafe,” Jace said, looking at the shy kid. He was trying so hard to get this kid to like him. He knew why he was so hesitant. Losing his parents in such a violent way, living on the streets, and having to get used to a new family, it wasn’t easy. Jace’s story wasn’t exactly the same, but he can relate to some of the boy’s experiences. Though Rafael was luckier than him on a couple accounts; he didn’t remember his biological parents like Jace did, he wasn’t raised by a maniac, and Alec and Magnus were much more suited to helping a shy little boy than Maryse and Robert was. Still, Jace felt like Rafe’s hesitancy was personal. He seemed to connect with Izzy and Clary, but still couldn’t meet his eyes. He loved his nephew and didn’t like that he was so uncomfortable around him, but he was going to be patient. 

Rafael looked up at Jace before ducking his head in embarrassment. Alec smiled, “Oh he’ll be the best by the time he’s 12, I’m sure of it,” his father bragged proudly, making Rafael blush.

“We should start training him and Chris together. With Chris’s mouth and Rafael’s stealth, they’d be able to do anything,” Jace said excitedly, ignoring the fact that Rafael’s stealth was because he’d had to learn to steal to survive. 

Alec gave him a look, but Rafael didn’t seem upset, so Alec looked at Rafael, “I’ll be out there with you guys in a couple hours, yeah,” Alec made sure it was truly okay. Rafael nodded. “Go easy on him,” Alec ordered Jace quietly. 

“I’m not going to hurt him,” Jace said offended, but a sharp look from Alec caused him to nod. “Of course,” he said seriously, and then nodding at his nephew with a smirk said, “Come on, killer. Let’s go teach you to kick butt.” Jace opened the door of Alec’s office and Rafael looked at Alec once more before leaving with Jace. Jace looked at Alec who looked slightly anxious. “He’ll be great, trust me,” Jace said before turning away.

“I do,” Alec muttered. It was the 6 year old who didn’t.

______________

“Okay so first things first. Let’s teach you a bracing stance,” Jace said as they entered the training area. There were other kids there and they glanced up in interest that the quiet kid from Buenos Aires was learning from Jace Herondale. They of course knew he was Alec’s adopted son and that his biological parents had been killed in the attack on the Buenos Aires Institute, but he was still extraordinarily quiet and they knew very little about him. 

Rafael moved into a bracing position that he’d learned on the streets when he was trying to not get knocked down by vampires. Jace raised his eyebrows in surprise. 

“Where did you learn that,” he asked, impressed by his little nephew’s form. 

Rafael shrugged. “You learn a lot on the streets,” he admitted quietly. Jace nodded, knowing well enough from his own experiences that that wasn’t something the child wanted to talk about at the moment. 

“Okay, so here we go. do not let me push you down,” Jace ordered. Rafael nodded and held his arms up and out so his balance was equal through his entire body. Jace started easily, just pushing his shoulder gently. Rafael moved his shoulder away in response to the shove but didn’t fall. 

Rafael didn’t fully trust the man yet, but he truly was a good teacher and even let Rafael get a hit in every once in a while, using his instincts to move away from shoves and swings. When Jace swung at his face Rafael reached up and blocked and then kicked one leg out, going to knock Jace off his feet. 

Jace jumped and dodged the attack and laughed, “Oh, we’re going there already then, huh?” Rafael grinned and nodded, widening his leg and bringing his arms against his face. 

“I used to watch street fighters, so tell me if I’m doing anything that’s not right,” Rafael admitted. 

Jace shrugged, “There’s nothing wrong with your form being a little different. Demons are going to throw lots of stuff at you and you have to be ready for anything.” 

When Alec was finally done with what he needed to do, he changed into training clothes and headed to the training room. The sight he saw brought a warmth to his soul. His son had Jace, who was laughing, pinned to the floor and a bright smile was on his face. 

“Alec, look!” Rafael called when he saw Alec, “I pinned the great Jace Herondale!” He jumped off his uncle. 

“I see that! Nicely done,” Alec high fived Rafael who giggled and hugged Alec’s side. “You’ll have to tell Magnus when you get home. He’ll be thrilled to hear this story,” Alec whispered. 

“I heard that!” Jace said as he stood. Alec chuckled, his arm draped around Rafael.

“Am I wrong?” Alec challenged. Jace grumbled, knowing he was telling the truth. “How’s it going?”

“Oh, your son is a better fighter than you already. Just wait till we get weapons in his hands.” 

Rafael blushed, but smiled and tugged on Alec’s hand, “Can I show you?” he asked shyly. Alec grinned and moved back from him, getting into stance. 

“Let’s see what you’ve got, Lightwood-Bane.” 

 

+1

Rafael was training with an older kid. The kid was 12 and wasn’t going easy on him, but Rafael was holding his own, he’d been training with his dad and his uncle Jace for the last few months. 

Suddenly the demon alarm went off and Rafael’s heart stopped. They were being attacked. Magnus is here with Max, needing to re-enforce the wards and brought Max along. His entire family was here! There was chaos as everyone was gathering weapons and trying to figure out what was happening. He didn’t know where Magnus and Alec were.

“Dad!?! Papa?!” Rafael cried, looking around for his dark haired parents. “MAX,” he cried louder, looking around for his blue-skinned brother, none of them were anywhere to be found, and he didn’t even see any of his uncles or aunts. Rafael grabbed a dagger since the sword was far too big for the seven year old. He had no idea what he was up against, but he wouldn’t be helpless. “Papa!!” He cried once more, breaking into a run as he headed to Alec’s office. “Dad!” 

Fear filled him as he passed Shadowhunters that were either knocked out or dead. Rafael’s heart raced as he saw Alec’s office door open. “DAD!” he cried as he ran in, but the office was empty, and Rafael felt like bursting into tears. Then suddenly Magnus burst in with Max in tow. “Papa!” Rafael cried in relief and leaped into Magnus’s arms. Magnus yelled out in happiness that both of his sons were safe. He held them tightly in his arms, kissing their faces. “I need you two to stay here I have to find—”

“OH, thank the Angel,” Alec came running in, and Rafael’s heart felt more whole than it had for a very long time. Alec ran over wrapping his arms around the three others and kissed Magnus’s lips desperately before kissing Rafael and Max’s foreheads. “It’s at least 4 higher level demons,” Alec said quietly to Magnus. Suddenly there was a crash and both boys whimpered in panic. Alec and Magnus put themselves in front of the them. “Stay here! No matter what you hear,” Alec rushed to the bookshelf and pulled a book that opened a secret room. “Both of you, go in here now. We’ll come get you when it’s safe.” Max opened his mouth to protest, but Rafael got to him first.

“You too! Please, please, Daddy,” Rafael begged, grabbing both of their shirts tugging towards the room. There was another sound that was closer. 

“I can’t, Rafe, you know I can’t. I’m head of the Institute. You have to trust me, please, do as I say and get in. We will be back. Believe me. We will be back. I promise. Do you trust that?” Alec asked. Rafael looked at his fathers who looked both worried for their sons but also eager to get out and protect others as well. Rafael did trust these men. After his nightmare of them dying, he had fully embraced that he was lucky enough to be a member of their family with no chance of being pushed away. 

“Yes,” he whispered. Alec exhaled heavily and kissed both Rafael and Max as Max began crying. Magnus did the same before grabbing Alec’s hand.

“We love you boys,” Magnus said as he and his husband ran out of the room, closing the door behind them. Max let out a soft sob, Rafael stared at the exit that his parents had just walked out of. Was that the last time he would see his parents? Was he about to lose both of his parents again? 

He heard a crash and Alec’s voice yelling, “You piece of shit! Fuck you!” 

Rafael pulled Max into his arms when the younger kid cried out in fear. “Shh, shh, quiet Maxie, we don’t want them to hear us,” Rafael whispered. Max buried his face in Rafael’s shoulder. 

“But Daddy and Papa,” the 5 year old whined. 

“I know, I know, but Daddy said he would come back, and we believe him right? We trust them, yeah?” Rafael said softly, in Max’s ear. “And you trust me? Because I won’t let anything bad happen to you.” 

Max nodded, “Yeah,” he agreed. Rafael hugged his brother closely to him. 

“We’re going to be okay, I swear to you, Max, we are going to be fine.” He promised over and over. Max gripped Rafael’s shirt as he rested his head on his shoulder. 

There were sounds of yells and crashes for what couldn’t have been more than 30 minutes, but it felt like forever. A cry of pain that sounded familiar, and Rafael shut his eyes as tightly as he could, willing it to not be someone he loved. Then it went quiet, and Rafael wasn’t sure what was worse. It was another couple of minutes before he heard someone enter the office. He moved his body so Max was shielded.

“Boys,” Alec’s voice breathed and both Rafael and Max let out a sob and ran into Alec’s arms.

“Where’s Papa,” Rafael cried since Magnus wasn’t in the room. 

Alec shushed him gently, “He’s in the infirmary, healing people, come on,” Alec stood, holding out his hands to each boy. They eagerly took his hands. 

“Is anyone we know hurt?” Rafael asked. 

Alec nodded, “Uncle Jace has a pretty nasty cut, but he’s going to be fine.” Alec reported. 

Rafael nodded. “If you say so,” he agreed. As they entered the infirmary they saw Magnus fighting with Jace who did indeed have a pretty terrible cut on his leg, but he kept trying to push Magnus away.

“I’m not that bad, Magnus. There are other people who need you more,” Jace growled in annoyance.

“And he could get to them faster if you would stop fighting and let him heal you,” Alec said with a raised eyebrow. Clary chuckled at Alec’s ability to shut Jace up better than anyone as the blonde crossed his arms and pouted before seeing his young nephews. His face fell in relief and he smiled at the two boys. 

“Your dads are mean,” Jace claimed. 

Max giggled and shook his head, 

“Only because you’re being stubborn, we’ll let Papa heal us when we get hurt,” Max claimed, sticking his chin in the air. 

“I’m going to hold you to that, Blue,” Magnus said as he poured magic into Jace’s injury. 

From the tone of his voice Rafael could hear he was tired. He noticed Alec had blood on his shirt, though whether it was his, Rafael didn’t know. He too looked exhausted. It might have been short but it was clearly a brutal battle. Still, as Magnus and Alec met eyes, both with worn smiles on their faces, Rafael knew everything had turned out okay. Rafael smiled quietly; his fathers had kept their word and that meant that he in turn got to keep his promise to Max. Jace was going to be fine and was as stubborn as ever with Clary standing over him fretting but mostly just in love. This was his family and they would do anything for him, and he would do anything for them. It had taken him a long time, but he finally trusted them, all of them.

**Author's Note:**

> Yup I need to be working on my other story but I just love writing them as fathers <3 <3


End file.
